happy morning full of squishy eggplant spread and bagels and kitties! four feet moving under the covers and a kitty in between�we mushed him, we did.

later this morning calls and news of the TT gone next week. just when we think we will get some time together it is taken away again�again. tonight, next week, so on, so forth�

is it possible to go through life without hope and expectations?
without, �but, i thought�?�s
without

and pain from early this morning, a little, but slightly growing. i�ll have to watch this�right in the middle of my chest, behind the sternum. either esophagus or wind-pipe or heart�take thy pick. i feel tight. this morning i thought my heart had stopped, feeling for a pulse and snuggled so close to my love. there was a pain like this the other day�but sharper and constrict/twisting�in the same place. reflux? attack?

*keeps watch*

methinks i need an appointment soon for my foot anyhoo, perhaps i'll call around today and see for an appointment in march.

kissing you is like kissing gravel, but feel's like getting off
kissing you is like sinking down into the moss
you look better upside down
you look better lying down

on the move
i can lose all my sympathy for you
sitting straight on the back of mother hate
what can I tell you? what can I say?

on my knees
i can see all your better qualities
so you freeze, i make frozen into heat
what can I tell you that you'll believe?

kissing you is like kissing gravel but feels like getting drunk
kissing you is like sinking down into the mud
you look better upside down
you look better lying down

for today i've arranged
to be just enough deranged
to relax in the arms of someone strange

i promise you today