once again, tired...and the coffee is loosing its effectiveness. this waking up at 2am, clutching the sheets, sitting up and stare shake staring at the door to my bedroom...expecting him to walk in and take.

*sigh*

without the kitties, i would be totally sleepless during the week. i only sleep when they press their little furry-ness unto the backs of my knees or feet. it is that slight pressure that lets me know that i am safe...and able to sleep. i call to them countless times in the night to have them come back to the bed...to purr...to make sure the creeks in the hallway are from paws...the thumps from kitty curiousity.

this is truly getting out of control (although the cats do not complain about the increased levels of petting.)

and when i slept last night i dreamt of bathing, reclining in a pristine claw-foot tub in the middle of a large room...surrounded by trees. addiktion was there and he watched, disinterested, waiting for the little clear star soap...for to wash his hands. he did not even pay me attention when i lathered up my breasts...mmm...

last evening was all about pasta salad and sculpture. (two great tastes that taste great together?) no. the sculpture is a wire tree for to hang my collars and jewlry on...and the pasta salad was nummy -- leftovers from the weekend rule, and sate me through the week. the thing about the sculpture is that now i have to determine how to hang it from its roots...perhaps in one of the corners in the bedroom. interesting.