i have noticed that i've been complaining a bunch lately in here
...mostly, i think, i've just been sicky and all around a grumpy-grump (last night 2 hrs. sleep/escape from sinus pain and such cannot help either.)

but

...mostly i could never win the my life is so horrible, much more than yourz game anyhoo. (although i can say that playing it isn't much fun, for no one ever wins...only looses.)

my life is actually pretty cool, at the moment.

sure it has its high and lows, peaks and valleys...yadda yadda and so on, so forth, ...but it is a'ight, and at this point in my life i think i can say that i am still the happiest that i have ever been...considering, always considering.

i was talking to idlechic last night about it (life/love/friendships/relationships)... and i really only have only one problem of considerable size at the moment. no fights, no anger, no broken glass, no fatalities, no real un-solvable-eventually tragedies...just time and space.

*shrug*but even that will end eventually, and patience reigns supreme.

side note:

i think one of the best things to see in the whole world...is to see people you love growing up, dealing, coping and finding themselves. this is a groovy groovy thing.

many of my friends are a bit younger than me (not that i am all knowing or any bullshit like that -- stop scowling)...and something happens to most people in the early/mid twenties and such...a change. at first you think it is just different lighting or something, but then you notice a certain maturity dawn, and decisions being made in a certain way. ah, hard to explain. it is just so neat to see...but it is unpredictable and happens to people in different ways and at different moments (some people just fear that change so much that they may never take it...)

i am not saying that these people have grown up, that is not what this is about...it is something else more pure, a coating, a shine...

a crossroads.

i hope i never stop changing and moving...i hope these feelings continue, yes.

9 hrs until love...