last night idlechic and i watched grrl, interrupted. there are parts in the movie that would unbalance any mental hospital vetran, ...but then again, such things are pretty easy.

(not quite as strong as you thought you were, are you now?)

mostly i thought it was pretty insincere, one of those movies about being a crazy person made by someone who is sane (even though i have heard now that it was mostly autobiographical. hrm.)

*shrug*

it did make me think about my past a bit more, "time for meds", my roomate who tried to off herself with tylenol five times -- staying up with her through "checks" to discuss how to comit suicide the proper way. i do not know.

...i still think that getting tattoos on the undersides of my wrists may be a good idea. perhaps something black and white to match the others? something on the line of an egyptian ra, flying scarab and horus. we shall see if i grow out of the whole egyptian thing, or if it continues to haunt.

then again, there is the whole sexy librarian thing and being professional and such...but...i have always thought that it is just a part of me. i do not think that i would wish to work in a place that forbid expression and such anyhoo (and the tragus piercings and such will stay.)

eep! that reminds me, have to take out some rings before friday surgery. luckily i can leave the ones in my ears in...as opposed to the MRI and EEG in boston...had to take out everything.

preposterous! pleh.

i had a dream the other night that one of my employees was in my kitchen, eating pie. not just any pie, but the pear, apple and ginger pie i made last week. nummy!

damn pie, turned all green from the inside out. yuk!

i have no mind for working today. my thoughts wisp here and there, flutterbyes. anxiety welling in my gut, in my knees. i am sick inside, and this had nothing to do with the flu...at least that is vanquished.

strength.

strength bring me to that cold office on friday morning, and keep me calm, and resolved to fate.

ok?

It's easy to deceive
It's easy to tease
But hard to get release

Les yeux sans visage -- eyes without a face
Les yeux sans visage -- eyes without a face
Les yeux sans visage -- eyes without a face
Got no human grace
your eyes without a face

woah, i just quoted that song for fun,...but somehow it seems a good quote for an online journal...eyes without a face, no?

silly me.