always the school bus driver, never the stripper | 07 July 2004 | 3:45 pm
it has been a hectic hectic day! peh. next monday a new employee starts in ADDboy's position, hopefully to be split up in the future into two full-time positions ...and i shall have me own full time archive staff (aside from me of course) ...and then my plan for taking over the world will be set in motion...
speaking of which - (ie. queendom, royalty, mastering, etc.) ...i am touched much too often. this makes riding the bus a bit unbearable...cab rides dread where the cabbie grabs my money hand, asking for a date...am i married...surely tomorrow? the meeting of new people is difficult - shaking hands, hugging, kissing ...licking. i believe i have become a bit of a prude. interesting and also horrible/pathetic.
more likely than not i have been building up the safe, the carapace again, a protection so futile, so delicate - more of a silken glass cocoon than anything else - wrapping my arms tight around this skin, my hair weaving a mask to hide the alone. i am poor at comfort... and am so far down into the self it would seem odd that people even find me warm at all.
i have to once again extend...to dance...to feel...to lick. my tt is the best popsicle there is, a certain truth, but play we shall...and frankly it is not all about the sex after all, jeez...we need kindred, adored and loved friends close by. it is difficult for me to let them (the strange and unfamiliar) in - for after all, i am not quite sure i understand what is in-side of me anymore...should i, could i share? there is the overwhelming good and the cruel...mix in a bit of spice and heat, easily marked heart/skin, loathing of the self as well as most humanity, stompy boots, honor/valor, and a good mask and you may glean me in a hazelnut.
question of the day:
What is your favorite kind of chocolate? Do you like nuts in it? If not chocolate, then what type of treat? meat?
ok - that question is weighted in a way, i do need to figure out what to send in packages after all - help me out people!
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