today i must concentrate on cleaning out this puter a bit...removing traces that i have been here, delete the dirt, scrape away the thin film of my existence.

today is projects and projectiles...i have nothing here to leave undone...these plans have been in the make for some time now. i only await the final call of my new company, a final yes to our dealings...finality.

my boss laments to me every time that he sees me that he is saddened to see me go...and this does not make transition easier for to be sure.

i need the guilt, i do...yes

...lay it on thick,
spread it on elbow hollows
sweet apple-butter,
drip it onto my neck
your blackberry honey
pooling to attract the bees,
proboscis tongues licking rapid
and burrowing into every pore
my skin pulled back
to expose my innermost calm.

i am made of rain, the air charged and green before that first strike of lightning
i am the rocks in the mud you sift between those polished toes
the very liquor you use to soothe your thoughts� ache

i am an artist, scrawling from the buried parts you will not see
i am a lover, assuming role after role, twisting and unquenched
i am lazy, sucking the very juice from your fingertips, reclining underneath the vines
i am a best friend, my fingers under the cleaver when your lighter fails
i am an urchin, a spined carapace protects and pricks
i am your dreams and fears, your mirror, you counselor

we are breathing the same air, at the fountain drink...precious tiny worlds reflected and revolving as the drops fall from our chins

i am a librarian, cataloguing emotions...everything in its own order

my foundation and structure, buttress strength flying, the straw sculpture that protects the egg...

i have love as well, strong and warped, weathered oak, birch elastic, willow whip

will you keep me forever?
in your pocket, warm against your thigh...
around your neck and dangling against breast bone, your necks� notch...

is this possible?

you don't want to hurt me,
but see how deep the bullet lies.

unaware I'm tearing you asunder...
ooh, there is thunder in our hearts.

is there so much hate for the ones we love?
tell me, we both matter, don't we?

you, it's you and me.

it's you and me
won't be unhappy.