headache again today. yesterday my beating head and i fell asleep on the ever so comfy couch around 5:30pm (i was trying to get up, but it kept pulling me back in) and did not wake until 10:30pm - ack. i get so frustrated when a precious evening with my tt (and oblivion) is wasted. grumpy grumpy me.

we have started up aikido again lately - at least 2 to 3 times per week. i would like to do more but pianos and anvils stop for no one - and there is this extra kneecap i have to worry about. i am putting off going back to the ortho surgeon as long as possible, yes. i think i am putting off therapy too - everything just seems ...so difficult.

not too much new going on, which is a bit of a blessing after the move. we plod on and through. we exist.

i want my right eye socket to not feel punctured with a railroad tie.
i want to relax and watch my tomatoes and basil grow.
i want to be really happy with my job and not just the people i work with.
i want to find a toothless freshwater eel for the new tank once it is established/stable.
i want to have the energy to exercise more and become the amazon i know is buried inside underneath all of the ugly/hate.
i want to feel wanted.
i want all of this DMV stuff to be over and to have my name changed everywhere so i can erase the other hyphen name forever.
i want to breathe sex.
i want to not be so needy.

what do you want?